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Not the competition”“And you thought leg room was an issue”“Where voluntary is mandatory”“Fight or flight. We decide”“Now offering one free carry off”“Beating random customers since 2017”“If our staff needs a seat, we’ll drag you out by your feet”“A bloody good airline”Some random thoughts...Did you know that there are more airplanes in the ocean, than submarines in the sky? Do not touch must be one of the scariest things to read in Braille.Arguing with a woman just like reading a software license agreement. In the end, you ignore everything and click I agree.People say love is the best feeling. I think finding a toilet when you are having to diarrhea is better.The moment when your steak is on the grill, and you can already feel your mouth watering. Do you think vegans feel the same when mowing the lawn?A fortune teller tells a woman “your husband will meet a violent end”. To which the woman replies “Will I be convicted?”Sometimes getting out of bed just ruins the whole day.Don’t. I took a shower, dried off, and wondered if I should shave my thatch. It was trimmed already (bikini, remember?), and I decided to just freshen the trim. I grabbed the first thing out of the closet and got dressed. After all, I was just going to take it off anyway.When I got downstairs, my pancakes were waiting for me. Dad usually made them after eating his own breakfast. Sometimes I'd see him just before he left. Today he was already gone, and as I glanced at the clock, I realized that, in spite of dressing so fast, I was running a little behind. It was the shower. I'd let my mind wander to what was going to happen today after I got to school, and spent too much time deciding to trim instead of shave.I ate in a hurry and left, riding my bike like I always do on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. Today of all days I didn't dare be late. I didn't want anybody thinking that I was trying to get out of anything. I rode off in fine form, my slacks feeling a little tight. Well, I wouldn't.
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